i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
