Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
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