Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
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