Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
