i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
