I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
sick fucks of a feather flock together
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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