he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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