Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
