My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize