Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
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