I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
