I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize