Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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