I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize
