We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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