I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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