Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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