return my video game
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
COCAINE IS GR8
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
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