I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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