she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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