dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize
