so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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