what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
