Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
