that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
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