His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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