If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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