Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
