Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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