My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Randomize
