I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
