He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
