If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Randomize