I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize
