VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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