Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Sacagawea was the original milf.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
