I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Randomize
