Don't you send me to vm
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
