He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Randomize
