Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
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