I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
