We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I am naked and annoyed.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
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