Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Porn is love you can see.
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
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