Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
