Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
