ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
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