It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
You can't just leave with hair like that
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
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