Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
