Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Randomize
