i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize